You'll probably get a medal or something for that....

"You'll probably get a medal or something for that...." the other mechanic said. And i looked at him, knowing he meant well, but still unable to speak. I just thought to my self how much he really didn't get it.

We had a plane that needed an engine change ....broke somewhere "on the road".I worked my normal 12 hr shift and was informed that i would be leaving later that evening on the recovery team. So i went to pick up my gear.... my kevlar, gas mask, flak vest, m-16......& ammo ...& then I packed an overnite bag....ate chow, showered, put on a fresh uniform and went to get my intel breifing......... I tried to doze off for half an hour..... trying to get some sleep, because i knew whatever i could sneak in right there was about all i was getting that night. & i waited some more...i waited & waited...... waited....For paperwork, manifests,for all things buerocratic.....we're leaving in one hour,... no two.....no tomorrow......no ... "your ride is inbound!! ten minutes out! ... grab your gear, i'll take you out to the plane"... Damn i was almost falling asleep!!

Never quite did understand the whole way military keeps time. If you are supposed to be there at 0800, that means 0745. If someone else is supposed to be there at 0800, if your not ready it means 0700, if you are it means like 0930- 1000. So while i waited that hour and a half for the ride that was "ten minutes out".... I thought about how tired i was..........how long a day or two it would be......and I hoped that nobody would make any mistakes that could damage anything and or/ anyone...............and then.........

i thought about how .....however tired i was, there are people who have been more tired and have done more important things. My brother in law is a doctor.....& his residency, was alot like like ranger school, from what i gather.....but with scalpels instead. He'll preform surgeries after being up a day and a half straight....food? may or may not eat ......it depends.

But when i was sitting there waiting for my ride.......trying to doze a little laying on the pavement.....I thought about all the guys out there, doing what almost seems humanly impossible......."soldiering on" long after the sleep and food reserves have been exhausted. I have some freinds in infantry, some that are ranger tabbed, but i'm guessing just about everyone who has wandered out side the wire far enough can relate to what i'm saying. But i can hardly say that this was the norm. for me. I know that however, for many it is. But thinking of my infantry freinds out there, put things in perspective. To them this would probably be an easy day. Finally, it was time to go.

So i got on the plane for a relatively short flight, i hadn't flown in awhile and i forgot how good it felt. We landed and did an engine running off--load of the mxs team and our gear.........and 24 hrs into my day we got to begin our engine change.

Although, nothing in the world of the military is quite that simple. We were parked off by ourselves and we would need an escort to get to our plane, because you had to contact the control tower to cross active taxi ways. The wings over hung the dirt/sand/ rocks which made it difficult to push the stands around. Some broke airplanes were parked behind ours...so when we were done fixing ours we would have to tow it to a runup pad (so our exhaust didn't pelt the broke aircraft in back of ours....)...and of course we would need an escort for that too... to be on tower frequency. Really very typical, though nothing hard or complicated about this one.. Our plane is just too big to be able to be completely self reliant, on a job like this. No big deal but whenever you need someones help....more waiting....

The engine change was no small deal in itself.......with a fresh team, under perfect conditions we would be looking looking at 12 hrs (before its ready to fly). And this particular location isn't ideal and the mxs team wasn't fresh.............that spot gets mortared regularly, and all i could do was hope we weren't gonna have any attacks to slow us down. I was hoping for the best but not counting on it.

We got the engine changed without much incident. The mxs team sent were all good guys willing to work together, & all knowledgeable in our trades (which is unusual under these circumstances.) I disconnected the engine from the plane while two of the guys removed the prop, and one drove the crane. The Army airfield commander made us take lunch after about 6 hrs of work cuz he wanted us out of the sun. But we were other wise just planning to eat an MRE. This sucked too cuz we had to take a bus.......then we were waiting for a bus ride back to stand in line to get something to eat...oh we had to stand to eat too....they were redoing another chow hall so this one got all the overflow....and couldn't accomodate everyone with seating......then we waited at a bus stop... and no bus came, and after waiting for about 20 min....we deicided to hoof it back....and got lost ....and of that.....all we seemed to accomplish was losing probably an hour and 1/2 (cuz it takes like 10 min to eat an mre)....and as a bonus we ended up feeling like crap ...'cuz full bellies on tired mechanics in the hot iraqi sun isn't exactly a pick- me- up.But we "soldiered on" ....or i guess "wrenched on"..... I hooked up the lines on the engine while the guys swapped the prop from one motor to the next, and while they did that....in the process they pinched a seal, so we were about to do our ops checks and the prop started leaking. We had to yank the prop back off to reseal it. Bummer. What was looking to be about an hour till we were ready forthe ops checks before lunch which was at o-lunch-thirty, now looked like it would be more like beer-thirty ...after the lunch fiasco and leaky prop. The later it gets the fewer the chances of getting a ride home that night too......

But we wrenched on, and resealing it turned out to be pretty smoothe. We finally finished...and went for an engine run ops check........ all of which took one second to say....but an hour or two to do .

Anyway, the engine change checked out........ we did a really good job...

And i suggested skipping the buerocracy and getting a ride back "home" now.....begging forgiveness later....but in keeping with military tradition....the ranking individual was not privvy to the traveling system, and bias to getting his azz chewed. (and a litle annoyed with my suggestions......."they are already working that" and.... "they said the only plane we can take is at oh-what-thirty local, there is no other way".....i have a hard time swallowing the bullshit that they feed the rank of the moment, when i personally know better. But i bit my tongue... as every good "knuckle dragger" should, and i just left him to think inside his box.


So we spent the night WAITING TO BE MORTARED because there, a whole day without an attack is pressing your luck. So we were there spending the night after a 36hr shift of working straight, probably about 40 hours till we were able to sack out. Nothing like working a day and a half straight...to find your self lugging your flak vest kevlars, weapon, ammo, overnight bag, around the base in the middle to a night to stumble into a tent...to try to find a vacant spot to sleep. By vacant i mean a bed without a body in it....because there was too much left over trash to really consider it vacant....oh.....they forgot to tell me when i check in at billeting....no linens. What the heck did i check in for? We dont pay....they dont take a credit card.....basically you tell them that hi im here i will be staying overnight. And they say ok....go try to find an empty spot...... they couldn't have told me then to pick up linnens. And now i have to go back to where i just came from....AND Nope!!! cant leave your weapon...or your ammo...or your anything...so back i go stumbling around IN THE DARK... to go pick up my linnens....but actually by this point i was so tired i was numb...beyond numb....and i didn't even care. Then i pick up my linens and stumbled around again by this point the straps from my pack pushed the sling for my rifle down on my arm, and i'm shortto begin with so the butt of my rifle was dragging in the stones----but.YUP!!..you guessed it!! wasn't caring!!...too tired and my hands were just too full to adjust. And if i stopped i didn't think i'd ever get going again...

So i got back to the empty spot at my LOVELY new home. Threw my junk down....by this point i was pretty much foaming at the mouth in need of water...because it is all non potable.....and it was now ending up to be a really long time since we had any access to water that we knew of. So i went to find some one (me and my trusty weapon and ammo and...)to ask where they had water available. Of course the places they pointed out were a hike and a half, and when you get there...."oh that's were we used to keep it.....now we keep it over there......" Arrrrghhhh.... I was about to say "screw it" when some guy came up and asked me if i needed any help.
I was about to ask him to marry me.... but i figured it would freak him out and i would never get any water..... so i just told him how happy i was to hear those words and asked if he had a bottle of water or new where i could get one. By this point my desperation musta been pretty evident, cuz i dont think he would have been more startled if i had gone and asked him to marry me. That was a looooooong day.

I passed out in my grease covered dcus....with my linen in a pile next to my bodyarmor and rifle on my bed. I did unlace my boots though. I have a question for you been-there-done-that's? What the hell do you do with your weapon when you shower? Do they have somewhere in the shower bay for you to put it so it doesn't get wet? Cuz this shower bay may as well not have curtains at all....if it was anywhere in there it was fair game..............

So yeah... i was just wondering.....

Our ride back to our ..... i guess.....rob..... rear operating base...landed at oh-what-thirty local..... almost 24hrs after we were done fixing mis piggy (the broke herk)& dropped off the flight crew. Then "persco" (people in charge of screwing up travel throughout the military from what i gather ) fed the rank more crap . (Did you notice...i just found how to make italics today)

Now............ they said that there was a plane coming in at almost-tomorrow-thirty local and maybe they can take us, and persco then said we couldn't get on that plane that we just fixed and fly back to our base with it because there wasn't enough time to do the paperwork. This was almost 19 hrs they had to do the paperwork. I have seen people get manifested in ten minutes when persco is trying to cover one of their screwups.......

Meanwhile, I did the stuff mechanics do, assisting the flight crew with the inspection to get the plane ready to go. The flight crew said that they had room to take us .

When our boss breifed us that almost-tomorrow-thirty local or ...(another-night-in-this-shithole-thirty zulu) ...was the only option......... i again tried to change his mind......because i knew other options.....and then was promplty reminded to bite tongue........

And Thuunk......Thuunk..Thuunk....then we got hit......and i was wlking in the direction of the bunker at the time anyway, and about maybe 30 ft in front of me i was now looking at this big cloud of dirt and smoke that seemed toto keep shooting upwards, and keep shooting upwards and keep shooting upwards....But no sirens, no one seemed particularly alarmed. WTF? No one looked even to be taking cover. And i look at the smoke and sand shoting up in the air and i said "is that what i think it is" to someone walking by without their armor...."thuunk ...Thunk....thnuk....." and he said Yes....as he began to move a litle more expeditiously now...... I wasn't wearing my kevlar or flak vest or anything, I heard a couple more "thunks"& i decided i wasn't gonna wait for the military to decide to sound the alarms......(back to that whole timeliness thing again)..... After all this was an airbase & Alarm red to the airforce usually means "last call"....... & probably that taking cover is a precautionary deal.....something that you do....but there is never a real actual threat!!!! That is pretty much the mentality ....or so it seemed.....

It was surreal....noone was taking cover.Like i was the only one who saw/heard it...I'm a cherry what can i say? I thought.... are we getting attacked?!?!?!? WTF?!?!?! No sirens.....???? (Maybe it's just EOD with UXOs or something....no sirens?? or nobody taking cover.?!?!?!?!?...).and i was looking at the smoke and then i heard more thunks and then finally sirens and sombody yelling in the most desperate chilling tone i have ever heard in my "high rent military career" "Is anyone O negative?!" and then people started taking cover.........but it was wierd .......you'd think people would take cover quicker cuz they get attacked and hit every day. The smoke and sand i came to find out was indeed a UXO or rocket that didn't go off...a dud. One airman wasn't as lucky as me..... one detonated 10 ft from him....and he lost both his legs and one arm.

We sat there in the bunker....... And i said to the ranking guy...."you know they didn't take off yet....we can still catch them, if we hurry" ....(after alarm yellow). Now he listened.....So i went to let the guys know we were gonna need transportation out to the plane to try to catch them (the flight crew) before they takeoff becuz they will be in a hurry to leave to avoid further delays due to any subsequent attacks that may or may not occur. And so after we got the all clear......we went out back to the plane but before we got there.............we were getting hit again............... so we went back to the bunkers .....this time with the flight crew ..... which became our new ride home.

While we waited that one out.... i wasn't afraid nor was mostly anyone else, around me....there was nothing you could do but take cover... and we were.... from what i have seen fear is anticipating the things you cant control.....and bravery is not the lack of fear but proceeding in spite of it....So there i was...not brave , and not afraid ...just there.

......and the other mechanic said........."you'll probably get a medal or something for that"... WTF?!?!?!? And i looked at him, knowing he meant well, but still unable to speak. I just thought to my self how much he really didn't get it. of my freind Adam who had his ears blown out....who didn't want a purple heart........and of the airman who was so badly injured..........I knew he would get a medal or two...but no medal is great enough to award sommeone for sacraficing their limbs, or their life. How did he think by doing nothing i could have deserved one, much less have even wanted one.....especially in comparison to all the great sacrafices that have been made by so many....................